At one point in our recent history, being an “empowered, modern woman” meant simply competing with men for similar work roles, and this perspective seemed to undermine the inherent importance, strength, and creativity of being a mother and parent. The Women’s Movement initially didn’t seem to encourage trying to find a balance between work and home, but rather it seemed to send out a message that a choice had to be made. Women sacrificed their deep connections with their babies prematurely, and still do. Yet there has been and continues to be a backlash against this myopic version of “success.” Women all over the place are trying to find more of a balance, finding validation for being a nurturer, without total compromise to one’s personal life dreams as well.
Anyone who has visited Nectar in the last year and a half has probably noticed the growing, toddling, babbling small being, or his toys and detritus adorning the entryway of the store. Yes, however unorthodox it can seem in our culture to bring your child to work most days, and even how difficult that even sometimes is, I feel so thankful to have been able to stay truly connected to my still nursing 1 1/2 year old. To watch him grow in a daily, hourly way, and delight in those small and silly changes, rather than hearing about it second hand. That might seem like a luxury, but I can assure you it is very much a conscious choice for which I would not have compromised anything, even while sacrifices are also made sometimes in terms of productivity, revenue and focus. Yet to me, it is just that important. I hope that as more and more women see that choice in action, they might make changes in their own lives too that will also support this extremely fleeting and exquisite time. Liam is already beginning to spend less hours here during the day– he has dates with friends or he goes to the park or library. And soon enough he will be going to school!
Whatever choices are made though, we all need to be more compassionate about parenting– the way we do it, and others, offering up a matrix of support, because we all need more of that. To coin the now well established cliche, it indeed “takes a village.” But that village needs to be as loving as possible, as eclectic and multicultural, and open-minded, so that all our children learn to be better global citizens and human beings.
Love,
Jenny
Driving away from Nectar one recent afternoon, I was overwhelmed with a feeling of excitement and gratitude for the unfolding warm days ahead. Spring in the Hudson Valley is truly an extraordinary thing to behold– something long awaited, something seemingly earned after slogging through the arduous days of snow shoveling and a starker landscape. True, this winter was freakishly mild, and yet, spring is another magical thing entirely. And so I began to free associate what spring really is for me, and words unfurled before me as I whipped over the beautiful roads towards home: Green. Budding. Beauty. Color. Rebirth. Fun. So many more, streaming out like water, like sunlight.
hat’s important now. NOW. This moment.
